There are many ways grandparents can hand on their faith to their grandchildren without making a big deal about it. Jeanette Brimner reviews these and adds that interested contact and good example are hard to beat.
‘We have a great deposit in children; let us attend to them with great care,’ advised St. John Chrysostom in the fourth century. His words are just as pertinent nowadays, especially when our precious children and grandchildren are living in a world which seems to negate and even belittle Christian values.
Difficult circumstances
I must admit that I’m even finding it difficult writing about passing on the faith to grandchildren. Despite my own and my husband’s best efforts at raising them to be good Catholics, not all my children go to church regularly and not all my grandchildren are baptized.
One consolation is that we know many other grandparents who are dealing with similar situations. All we can do is to continue to live our lives in a Christian manner. We must pray and attend Mass regularly in order to receive the strength we need to handle the problems and situations unique to our complicated world. Eventually, we hope that through our faith, prayers and example, our grandchildren will get to know and love God and learn to rely on Jesus in their life’s journey.
Bible stories
Lila’s two young grandchildren are not taken to church regularly but at least their parents are teaching them to be kind to other people. They often read them Bible stories and books showing how children can show their love for one another.
Lila has given the parents a brightly illustrated book of the Bible, written so that children can easily understand it. When walking with her grandchildren she points out, with their help, the many wonders God has created such as the plump robin plucking a juicy worm out of the garden to feed her ravenous babies waiting in the nest. During this sharing time the grandchildren also learn to be more observant and understand how precious the environment is and what we need to do to protect it.
When Lila babysits them for a weekend she takes them to Mass with her and answers any questions they want to ask about the ceremony or surroundings. Her grandchildren know that when they go to Grandma’s, they say grace before meals and talk to God before going to bed. She is gently instilling in them the knowledge that God loves them very much and wants the best for them.
Role model
My Grandpa Pat was a kind and gentle but mischievous person who played practical jokes on us and babysat all seven of us when Mum and Dad were away. He taught us by example to be kind to others and always made sure we all got to Mass on time on Sunday morning.
When I caught him saying the rosary while he was waiting for me to come home for lunch one afternoon, I realized how much he loved Jesus and Mary, even though he seldom talked about religious matters. Grandpa was always willing to take the nuns who lived nearby on errands despite the inconvenience it may have caused him.
He also took part in community endeavours including urging that fluoride be added to the drinking water in the 1950s, when scientists realized it strengthened the teeth of children who drank naturally fluoridated water. Grandpa’s example of regular church attendance, prayer life, honesty, concern for others and his joyful outlook on life helped deepen and strengthen my own faith.
Imaginative approach
There are so many ways grandparents can pass on their faith to their grandchildren when they visit. Grandparents can read to their grandchildren child-orientated and well-illustrated Bible stories and afterwards have the children re-tell the story in their own words or act the story out.
Also, they can take the youngsters to Church-sponsored programmes such as Easter and Christmas pageants during the holiday season. They can provide craft activities that encourage them to show what they have learned and felt after attending one of these special events.
Teaching children by example by taking them with you to visit a sick person or having them make and send a card to an elderly relative will urge them to be thoughtful of others. Honesty and other traits are taught more by setting a good example than by preaching.
Pre-teens and adolescents, though more difficult to entertain, are more apt to want to do activities with their grandparents, things they really enjoy such as visiting a water park, beach or a sports event when they can bring their friends along. During these times there will be opportunities to teach spiritual values in ways that are both fun and interesting.
Discussions about life’s issues such as school problems, difficulty with parents, falling in love and where to go for higher learning, can be carried out over hamburger and milkshakes at the local take-out. Grandparents might seize opportunities to sprinkle a few words of wisdom throughout the conversation after carefully listening to the points of view expressed.
Good example
The best we can do for our grandchildren is to be ourselves when they are with us, showing interest in their activities and ideas and staying in touch through letters,e-mail and visits if they must move far away. If our faith is strong and we are trying to live Christ-centered lives, then we can’t help but influence our grandchildren in positive ways without being preachy or pious, which would certainly turn them off. As Benjamin Franklin wrote, ‘A good example is the best sermon’. What better gift could we give our grandchildren, along with our daily prayers for them?
This article first appeared in The Messenger (December 2007), a publication of the Irish Jesuits.
